entertainmentqueen

The truth about Hollywood

Has anyone noticed that Hollywood looks like the bottom of a trash can? The streets are sticky and dirty and it smells like a rotten egg mixed with weed. And every so often, if you don’t step in dog poop, you are sure to step into random puddles of puke.

 It’s the only city in the United States where a gin bottle and two condoms can flood out an entire neighborhood because no one bothers to clean the sewers. It’s the only city where the Department of Water and Power will then wait for a gin bottle to flood out a neighborhood and then get a really long tube and a few chlorine tablets and suddenly it’s drinking water for millions of residents.

And, it’s the only place in the world where you could be walking home from a club late at night and instead of walking into not only your normal mugger or social deviant, you instead walk into your normal mugger, social deviant and their pet skunk, who sprays you repeatedly until you give up your valuables (which if you actually live in Hollywood aren’t worth very much).

Do yourself a favor, stay out of Hollywood!

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